Little moments, big thinking

Have you ever found yourself reading the same story for the fifth night in a row, playing endless rounds of peek-a-boo, or watching your child spend ages trying to fit a puzzle piece into place? While these moments may seem ordinary, something extraordinary is happening. Your child is building their ‘thinking brain’.

The first five years of life are a period of remarkable growth. During this time, children’s brains are developing at an incredible rate, creating connections that will support learning, relationships, health and wellbeing throughout their lives.

Researchers use the term ‘executive function’ to describe a group of thinking skills that help us manage our thoughts, feelings and actions. For young children, these are the skills that help them remember information, focus attention, control impulses, solve problems and adapt when things change. They are not skills children are born with. Instead, they develop gradually through loving relationships, play, conversation and ordinary everyday experiences.

Simple back-and-forth exchanges help children develop language, attention, memory and emotional security. They also help children learn that their thoughts and feelings matter, that we have heard their voice and we are interested in what they have to say, show or babble to us. This is why warm relationships are so important. Children learn best when they feel safe, connected and understood. Before they can manage their own emotions and behaviour, they need adults to help them. In many ways, children ‘borrow our calm’ before they develop their own.

Play also has a crucial role in building the ‘thinking brain’. It can be tempting to see play as something that is separate from learning, but for young children the two are inseparable. Play is a necessity and a right. It’s how children make sense of the world around them. When a baby gurgles happily during peek-a-boo, they are developing memory and anticipation. When a toddler freezes during a game of musical statues, they are practising self-control. When a pre-school child works out how to build a tower that will not fall, they are developing problem-solving skills and flexible thinking.

Perhaps the most important message of all is that brain-building happens during everyday family life. It happens while sharing stories, singing songs, chatting over breakfast, walking to the park or getting ready for bed. These moments may seem small, but they have a lasting impact.

So, the next time you find yourself answering another curious question or reading a favourite story for the hundredth time, remember: you are doing far more than filling time. You are helping your child build the foundations for learning, wellbeing and future success. You are quite literally building your child’s brain.